Prayer through Poetry at Biola University, November 14, 2013
I did some spoken word last thursday. I’m learning a lot. You know how you have those things that are just super special and you love them because they are tied to you and it doesn’t matter what others think so much? That’s how I felt about this one right here.
I am a work in progress.
I am a work in progress.
Even in my best dress, I am still in progress.
Even when it seems that I’ve regressed, I must remember. I am a work in progress.
I want to learn to be content in the process of change. When pennies and nickles and dimes don’t make any sense.
Sometimes I feel like I have such a long way to go. Like there is so much I want to fix. I know. I should be there
I want to be there
Why am I not there yet
Why does it feel like I am doing everything wrong
When these questions fill my head I remember what The Lord said
"I am with you always." I am here. And He is here. And we walk together.
I am loved as I am. I am loved in transition. Because of love I am free in this place. I am free to look myself in the face. I am free to breathe and I am free to rest
Even in my restlessness I am held.
Held. I am held. I am held tightly in the grips of grace. And by that embrace I am no longer filled with darkness but am able to experience the fullness of God’s goodness. I can open my eyes and see, I am in progress. I am a work in progress.
Our part is simply to begin.
To begin as best we can. To keep making progress. To keep moving forward. To take one step. And then another.
Until the day I breath my last breath, and even then, I won’t be able to say
I have arrived.
I will never arrive. I will never be done growing or learning or taking steps.
1 Thessalonians 5:19 says “Don’t stifle the spirit.
So I am recognizing the space in front of me and I am letting Him fill it. I am letting Him lead knowing that the seed inside me is growing.
And I will take another step. In the in-between, while I wait, God sees me. In the overwhelming sea of unknown that surrounds me He knows me and myy depths. He sees what I cannot see and knows what I cannot know and yet in the dark depths of my heart he is there. He is here. With me.
The greatest craftsman, He created me with glorious plans and when all I see is scraps scattered on the floor he still sees me as a beautiful outpouring of his love and creativity.
Hindsight isn’t always 20/20 and things still seem unclear to me. But the One who is with me has 20/20 foresight and in His might I am seen perfectly.
Cocooned in his mercies, I am no longer where I once was. And I don’t have to be where I feel I ought to be. I can be here. Now. I am a work in progress.